It's Not Fair
by ShyWriter122
Summary: After coming back from the future, Donnie goes into a depression. He won't eat or sleep and it's starting to affect his health. His brothers are worried sick. Can Raph help Donnie? No T-Cest. Will definitely include brotherly fluff later on. :)
1. Chapter 1

Why Me?

**This is my first FanFic that will have chapters. I was watching my favorite episode of TMNT 2003 and it just got me thinking. Why would Draco and the Ultimate Ninja send Donnie to a horrible future? Their biggest grudge was on Master Splinter and Leo. So why Don? I think it was extremely cruel to send the other turtles to fun places and send poor Donnie to a future where he has to see his brothers die. In case you are wondering, the episode is called "Same as it Never was". Thus, I decided to write this story. I hope you enjoy **

It was 3 o' clock in the evening. The Hamato family were watching a movie. 'Childs Play' to be exact. Well, all except Master Splinter. He was meditating as usual, in his own little world. They had all come back from the alternative dimensions that Draco and the Ultimate Ninja had sent them. Only a few days ago.

Leo was sent to a feudal Japan-like dimension, where he met his old friend Usagi and helped Lord Noriyuki to defeat a foe. Mikey went to a dimension where the turtles were all superheroes and their arch-nemesis was Splinter himself. Raph went motor bike racing on some alien planet. And Lastly, Donnie had been sent thirty years into the future.

Donnie had been, in a way, traumatized by the experience. He was the most sensitive out of the four of them. Seeing his brothers die right before his eyes had scarred him. He would lock himself into his lab and just sit there, staring at nothing. Not inventing, not fixing things, not building.

Sometimes his brothers would be able to hear soft cries if they were quiet enough. However, no one could come in and whisper soothing words of much needed comfort. After all, the door was locked. It's not like they didn't try. They did. But, unfortunately, it was futile. They couldn't persuade him to come out. They couldn't knock down the door either. It was Donnie's lab. He probably made the door out of titanium or something. Not even his own father could reach him.

Most nights, Don would have terrible nightmares. Terrible enough to keep him up all night. They were so bad that he had driven himself into a state of insomnia, refusing to sleep. For fear that yet another nightmare would haunt him. The lack of sleep and stress was beginning to affect his health. He would faint often and grow light-headed extremely easy. He wouldn't eat nor sleep. Only using tablets to stay alive. An artificial life. With every passing day he would get worse, and with every passing hour, his brothers would continue to worry. Until Raph had enough.

The movie was finished and Mikey was staring blankly at the credits on the screen. He yawned and switched the T.V off. "I'm gonna go to bed. Even though it's like 3 o' clock. I'm exhausted after that fight yesterday". He laughed.

Leo turned briefly in Mike's direction and nodded. From Leo's tear stained mask, Mikey guess he had been crying. Leo was extremely worried about Don. The fact that Don was so depressed tore him apart. He took Mike's place in front of the T.V.

Michelangelo did a ninja back flip to get to the second floor where his room was. As he was walking, he heard crashing sounds coming from the lab. He sighed, knowing that he couldn't do anything about it. Don wouldn't unlock the door. With tears in his eyes, Mikey went into his room and closed the door.

Meanwhile, Raph was in the dojo, taking out his anger on one of the training dummies. Donnie's depression had been affecting him the most. He couldn't stand knowing that his brother was suffering and he couldn't do anything about it.

He collapsed down from exhaustion. Raph was panting and gasping for air. More anger flared up inside of him. Scowling, he punched the brick wall angrily with all his might. The pain made him feel dizzy, but he didn't care. Whatever Don was going through, it was much worse.

His fist stung and it was bruised and bleeding heavily. Lost in thought, he stared down at his injured hand. _Why can't he help Donnie? Why was he so useless? What did Don go through without him? _All these questions were spinning in his head. Unanswered questions.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Hey everyone! Chapter two is finally out! Like my first one, it's not going to be a very long chapter. However, my next chapters will definitely be longer. Anyway, I really hope you enjoy this chapter. **

_Why me? What did I do to deserve this? _Donnie was inside his lab. He was slumped in his chair, staring at the blank screen of his computer. Sighing, he cradled his head into his hands. His vision was getting blurry. _Must be the lack of food, _he thought grimly, not caring. Don glanced over at the sharp cutting knife in his toolbox. _Should I?_

Raphael was sulking on the couch, with his hand stretched out to Leo who was bandaging it. "Donnie usually did these kind of things". He whispered sadly. Raph tensed and shot Leo a death glare. He brought his face closer to Leo's and scowled. "What are you trying to do"? He hissed angrily. They both looked to their left where Mikey sat. Unfortunately he had heard everything. Their little brother gave a sad smile, as if to say, _don't worry guys. It's ok._ He got up and left. Raph and Leo's focus was still on Mikey. Raph's face showed pure anger but in truth, that was only a façade. He was trying to hide his concern. The people who were closest to him, knew this all too well.

Mikey left and Leo went back to Raph's hand. He seemed to be quite skilled in first aid, Raph noticed. Tying the bandage into a neat knot, Leo stood back and admired his work. "All done!" He exclaimed, somewhat happily. "So now are you ready to tell how you did this to yourself?"Leo switched to big brother mode.

"I punched a wall." Muttered the younger of the two.

Leo raised an eyebrow. "And why did you do that?" He was getting more curious.

Raphael sighed. "I don't know… I guess I was just angry". He paused. "And upset. Ever since that Ultimate ninja guy and his pet dragon sent us to those weird dimensions, Donnie's been…." He shut his eyes tightly, showing that he was hurt. "I wanna help Don, Leo. I really do". He looked at the leader with pleading eyes. Eyes that were filled with a mixture of concern, fear, sadness and anger.

_Did he just tell me how he feels? _Leo could hardly believe it. He opened his mouth to speak, but his voice came out raspy. He cleared his throat.

"I know how you feel Raphie". He waited for Raph to protest about using his childish nickname, but surprisingly Raph didn't say a word. Seeing this, Leo continued.

"We all want to help him. What kind of brothers would we be if we didn't? But he won't let us. It's not like we haven't tried."

Raph banged his fist on the coffee table, causing the tea cup to fall and shatter into pieces. That didn't seem to bother him. He winced from the pain.

"So then what the hell do we do?!" Leo had warned him many times about using bad language, but at this point, he didn't care.

"Are you just gonna let our brother die?!" He looked Leo straight in the eye, expecting a decent answer.

Picking up the bits of shattered glass, Leo didn't even bother to look up. Instead, he replied. "If you honestly think I would let my own brother die, Raphael, then there is something seriously wrong with you!" His tone was harsh, cold. Almost as if he was disgusted with Raph.

Raph scoffed. "Fine Leo! You're not gonna do anything, but I, on the other hand, will!"

And with that, he got up from the couch and stormed out of the lair. Leaving a hurt Leo behind with a cut finger.

Mikey silently tiptoed over to Donnie's lab, keeping an eye out for his brothers. This wasn't very hard for a ninja though.

He inhaled deeply, and then slowly exhaled, in attempt to calm himself down. He didn't notice however, that his hands were trembling. He had made a decision to confront Don.

Stepping closer to the door, he pushed down on the handle. It was locked. Just how it always was.

He swallowed the lump in his throat. Bringing his hand up again, Mikey tapped on the door three times. He waited.

"Go away!" Came Donnie's voice from the other side of the door. Mikey knew something like this was going to happen, but he couldn't give up so easily. He thanked God Raph had gone out of the lair after the argument with Leo. But, his oldest brother was still home. He had to be cautious.

"No Donnie, I won't. You don't have to open the door, but at least hear me out. We're all worried sick about you. Please Donnie, you have to eat. And sleep as well. Your body needs rest, you're gonna die if you keep going on like this! You can't keep living on tablets!"

Mikey sniffled. A sob escaped his throat. Soon enough, he fell down on his knees beside the door, crying uncontrollably. He stared down at his own tears that kept falling onto the floor.

"Please Don! Please! Can't you see what you're doing to us?! You're my best friend! You know that right?! Donnie, I am literally begging you right now! Please open the door!" He buried his face in his hands. His sobbing didn't stop.

"Please bro," he whispered sadly. Mikey was nearly in hysterics. He kneeled against the door, trying his best to stop crying. It was useless. Nothing could even begin to describe how he felt now.

Suddenly, Mikey laughed a cold, humorless laugh. "You are so selfish Don! Ya know that? By doing this to yourself, you're tearing us apart! What do you not understand?!"

After all Mikey said, there was no answer. He wiped his tears and stood up. Banging his fist against the door, he screamed, " I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME DONATELLO! YOU COWARD!"

With a desperate sigh, he collapsed down beside the door in exhaustion and grief. He gave up.

**Ooooh I wonder what's gonna happen to Mikey and Donnie. "Evil grin". Haha. But stay tuned since chapter 3 is coming soon. Hope you liked it **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey I'm back! Someone, here on FanFiction reviewed me and asked me to make the chapters longer. So here it is! A really long chapter. More are coming soon. And yes, they will all be longer. I still don't know how many chapters there will be in this story. I'm kinda deciding that as I go along. But I better stop talking now so you can read the story. Hope you enjoy **

_Is he ok? What the hell happened? Who did this? Raph, go get me a wet cloth. Gotcha!_

Michelangelo moaned. He was awakened by the voices of his concerned brothers. He felt something cool on his forehead. Sitting up slowly, he tried to adjust to his surroundings. This was Leo's room, or so it seemed. The bed he was lying on was a Japanese Futon. Everything was neat and organized. Meditation candles were placed all around the room. Also, there were Japanese scrolls hung up on all four walls. _Yep, definitely Leo's room._ Thought Mikey.

"You're awake?"

Mikey jumped. He placed a hand on his heart, still panting. "Jeez Leo! Give me a heart attack, why don't ya?" He half joked.

Leo didn't smile. Instead, he sat onto his bed next to Mikey. Mikey reached up and took the cloth off his forehead, throwing it onto the floor. He sighed. "I passed out, didn't I?" He tilted his head to face Leo.

Leo nodded sternly. He had a serious look on his face. Although, just like Raph, he was trying to hide his concern.

He put a gentle hand on Mikey's shoulder. "I saw everything bro." The youngest's eyes widened and he could feel tears threatening to fall.

"Leo….I-I'm so sorry. I tried. Honestly I did. Please forgiv-". His voice cracked. Immediately, Mikey burst out crying.

Leo could hardly believe it. He cursed Don. How could he do this to his baby brother? How could he put them all in so much pain? Leo clenched his fists, but was interrupted from his thoughts when he remembered Mikey was crying. He felt as if his heart melted. Mikey's innocent baby blue eyes were filled with so much sadness.

"Aww Mike. Come here"

He grabbed his little brother into a tight, comforting hug, resting his chin on Mikey's head.

He buried his face in Leo's chest, seeking warmth and reassurance.

"Don't worry little brother. You did the best you could. You don't need to do anymore. Whatever it takes, we will help Donni-". Leo stopped, regretting he had said that.

Could he fulfill such a promise? He hated to lie to his brothers. Would he be able to deal with the guilt of lying? Leo didn't know.

Mikey slowly looked up into his eldest brother's eyes. He sniffled. "Donnie will go back to normal, right Leo?"

Instantly, Leo knew what to do. He couldn't stand to see his precious baby brother so distressed. He kissed Mikey's forehead gently. "Of course he will. I….promise bro. No, I swear it."

Leo felt tears in the back of his eyes. A wave of guilt washed over him. _I'm so sorry Mike. Forgive me. Please forgive me. _He thought.

Leonardo let go of his brother. "Come on Mikey, you should get some rest." He nodded.

Tucking him in, Leo placed another kiss on his forehead.

"Good night little brother. Just leave everything to me. Don't worry anymore."

The leader faked a surprisingly realistic smile. If it meant Mikey was happy for now, nothing else mattered. Leo just dreaded the day when he would have to see the look on Mikey's face when he found out it was a lie. Who was he kidding? Don was too far gone. _But still._ Leo thought. _That doesn't stop me from trying. For Donnie's sake. For everyone else's sake. For my sake._

He whispered. "It's ok bro. You can sleep in my room tonight. I'll just take yours." Mikey flashed him a smile. "Thanks bro".

"Good night. Love ya big brother".

The purity and innocence in his voice made Leo stop dead in his tracks. He turned his back to Mikey, facing the door. _A leader should never show emotions._ He remembered a quote from a book he read. _Emotions are a sign of weakness. _

With his back still turned, he let the tears fall freely; dropping onto the floor.

Leo walked towards his door and switched the light off. His voice trembled. "I love you too Mikey". And with that, he shut the door.

With no one to see him now, he sat down on the floor with his back leaning against the door, and cried. The tears he could not shed in the presence of others were pouring out now.

_I lied to Mikey. What kind of brother am I? I just couldn't bear to see him like that. Still, is that a good enough excuse for lying? Ugh, so many problems. I just want them all to end. It's not fair. Why me? Why Donnie? Why….us?_

He slowly rose to his feet, wiping his tears and heading to Mikey's room. He was exhausted.

* * *

_Should I? _His vision still blurry, Donnie made his way to the other side of the lab where his toolbox lay. He hadn't used it since. He picked up the knife and stared at it. _Am I brave enough?_ He thought. _I just want the pain to end._

Don lifted up the knife; its stainless steel was shining brightly under the light bulb. Bringing it down slowly, he positioned it a few inches above his wrist and drew it across his flesh. Donnie winced. Immediately, red liquid started pouring out of the wound, making a small puddle of blood on the ground.

It hurt but, oddly it felt good at the same time. For just a few seconds, he felt as if all the problems and worries washed away, and he got lost in the cooling sensation of the blood trickling down his arm. He'd have to make sure to clean the cut properly and bandage it. Don wasn't sure why it felt so good. However, he was sure of one thing. He had to do it again.

Ignoring his first cut, he picked up the knife again and made two small, diagonal x shaped cuts just beside his previous one. As the blood came out, he felt that amazing feeling again. It was like he was addicted.

Sighing from the pleasure, he got up to treat his wounds, but fell down soon after. He was weak as it was from not eating nor sleeping, and losing blood was the last thing he needed.

The dizziness made him feel like he was about to throw up. Donnie quickly grabbed onto his chair for support, and sat down.

He desperately wanted to sleep. The exhaustion was overwhelming. But he couldn't. He got terrified from even thinking about the nightmares. _I have to stay awake!_ He thought.

Just then Mikey's words came back to him. _You're gonna die if you keep going on like this! You can't keep living on tablets!_ Mikey had seemed so desperate. _I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME DONATELLO! YOU COWARD!_

Donnie felt extremely nauseous. Was he really causing his brothers so much pain? A sudden thought occurred to him. _If I'm making them suffer so much, wouldn't they be better off without me? Are they better off if I'm dead? Life is just so hard. That world, that future, it was a nightmare. So much pain. It's not fair. _He thought.

* * *

It was 4pm. Master Splinter had left that morning for 3 days to visit an old friend. Mikey was still sleeping after last night's incident. Leo was doing some complicated katas in the dojo. And Raph had gone out with Casey.

Leo put the blindfold on and successfully sliced the six candles with his sword. He heard the lair door open. _That's gotta be Raph._ He thought. Pulling off his blindfold, he went to greet his brother.

Raph attempted to sneak past Leo but immediately groaned when his elder brother already saw him.

"Welcome back Raphie". Leo said with a smug smile.

"Ugh I'm not in the mood fearless." He muttered. "Anything new with Don?"

Leo's smile faded. He shook his head and Raph sighed sadly.

The red masked turtle's attention turned to Leo's hand. He saw the wound on it. Attempting to hide his worry, Raph smirked.

"What's the matter Leo? After I punched a wall, you decided to try it out for yourself?" His smirk grew wider.

Leonardo looked down at his hand. _So he doesn't know…._ He thought.

"Haha Raph! Very funny! I got this cut when I was cleaning up the glass you broke. I got distracted while arguing with you and cut myself.

Raph's eyes grew wide and he almost choked on his words. "y-you mean it's my fault?"

"Yep". Leo was enjoying this a little too much.

The younger stepped forward and grabbed Leo's injured hand, examining it. There was a deep cut across the back of his hand. He let go gently, cautious as not to hurt him.

"Does it hurt?" His eyes were filled with guilt and worry. _Why does my stupid temper always hurt those I care about?_

Leo softened up a bit, feeling bad for teasing Raph. _He is truly concerned. _Leo thought.

"No Raph, it's my fault. I was careless." He smiled.

"I asked ya a question! Does it hurt"? His voice was firm, but gentle.

Leo sighed deeply. "Yes. But like I said, it's not a big deal."

Raphael scowled. "Yes it is!" He wondered what to do. He had zero knowledge when it came to medical stuff. He barely even knew how to bandage an arm. Wishing Donnie was here, he looked in the direction of the lab.

"Go sit on the couch. I'll be there in a second."

Leo raised an eyebrow, wondering where this was going, but did as he was told. Raph went to get the first aid kit but suddenly stopped. It was in Donnie's lab. He could feel his heart beating faster.

He shouted across the room. "Uh I'll be a little longer. Ok Leo?!"

His reply was a short "Sure".

Approaching the lab, Raph wiped the sweat off his forehead. _Ugh! Why am I sweating? It's not even hot. _Nervously, he knocked twice on Donnie's door. There was no reply.

"Sorry to disturb you Donnie, but could I just come in to get the first aid kit for Leo?" Still no reply.

Raph was getting pissed off. He kicked the door and surprisingly, it was unlocked. The door slowly opened. He gulped. Could this be it? The door was open. Maybe he could finally talk to Don. A spark of hope lit up inside him.

Pushing the door farther, he entered, his eyes searching around the room for his beloved little brother.

However, much to Raph's dismay, Don wasn't there. _I knew it was too good to be true._ The lab was empty. There wasn't even any trace that someone had been there. But, this was a rare opportunity. He could finally look around and maybe find something useful.

Remembering the reason he came here, Raph went deeper into the lab to search for the first aid kit.

After a few seconds, he spotted it. It wasn't very hard to find. The kit was placed onto a shelf beside the door.

Suddenly, he saw something that made him drop the first aid kit, spilling out the contents. Raph stood there, mouth open in horror and shock. _No God damn way…_He thought.

He couldn't move. The shock of it all made him freeze. He could not believe it. There were tears in the back of his eyes and even though it was unusual, he didn't even try to hold them back. He just let them flow freely from his eyes.

The only thing he could do was stare. A part of him wanted to run away, and a part of him wanted to smack some sense into Don.

It was too much for him. Way too much.

"LEO!" Raph yelled. His voice could be heard extremely loudly from the living room, but luckily Mikey was a heavy sleeper.

The leader was beside him in a flash. He had ran into the lab as soon as he heard Raph call his name.

When he saw his brother crying, he felt a wave of panic. Raph never cried. Ever. What could be so bad that had driven his hot-headed brother to tears? All Leo knew was that he was ready to beat the shit out of whoever did it.

Raph lifted a shaky hand up, and pointed towards Donnie's worktable.

Then Leo saw it. He gasped. There, on the table, was a puddle of blood and several blood stained knifes of different shapes and sizes.

Two thought occurred to them. One, either someone hurt or killed Don and took him away, or two, Donnie had been cutting himself.

Leo wanted to cry too. Raph was still frozen in fear. The blue masked brother tried to speak, but no words came out. Both of them were terrified. _What happened to Donnie? Could my little brother be self harming?_ They both thought simultaneously.

**I hope you guys enjoyed Chapter 3! I certainly enjoyed writing it. Although I had a bit of difficulty writing the part where Donnie cuts himself. I didn't know how to put it in words. But Hey! I'm only a beginner. Anyways… Chapter 4 is coming soon! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello Everyone! Izzy's back! Chapter 4 is finally out. Sorry for the long wait. Enjoy! **

Raphael was pacing back and forth while Leo sat on the couch. They were both lost in thought. After what happened yesterday, no one went near the lab. Mikey was shocked when he heard the tragic news. He had burst out crying right in front of Leo and Raph, and at that moment, they instantly regretted telling him. After all, how would one feel if their best friend and brother were cutting themselves? Donnie had returned home the other night and all of them were relieved that he was ok. No one knew where he had gone though. Also since he had come home, the answer was clear; Don was self harming.

Raph suddenly stopped pacing. He turned to Leo.

"I have an idea." He didn't sound excited at all, for he was practically sure the plan would fail. However, it was worth a try.

"I'm listening."

Raph sat down on the coffee table in front of his brother. "Listen carefully."

Leo nodded.

"Donnie used to be good friends with April. He was closer to her than all of us." He spoke matter-of-factly.

"But". Raph continued. "He stopped talking to her ever since…..you know. So maybe if we call April, she can talk to Don and help him. We already told her the situation."

Leo waited for Raph's words to sink in, making sure he understood them fully. Finally he spoke.

"Ok but, how do we know Don's gonna let her in? You know he locks the door."

Raph shrugged. "She won't have to come in. April can just talk outside the door, like Mikey did. Come on Leo! Let's give it a shot! It might work." His eyes shone with the tiniest spark of hope.

Leo stood up. "All right Raph. We'll call April tonight." He smiled.

* * *

Raphael was sitting on the rooftops, watching the city, the cool night air refreshing him. There was barely anyone below. Just the occasional car driving past. It wasn't common for it to be so quiet at this hour. Most people would be returning home from work. Then he remembered it was a Bank Holiday.

"I knew I'd find ya here".

Raph turned around, his hands on his sai, preparing himself for and attack. A dark, shadowy person stepped forth from the darkness. He couldn't make out who he was. Taking his weapon out, he stood there in a defensive pose; a menacing grin on his face. With all the troubles at home, Raph hadn't fought anyone in ages. The adrenaline was pumping through him.

As the shadowy figure came closer, he instantly recognized him.

"Geez Raph! Some people would think you weren't happy to see me." He smiled.

Raphael relaxed, sheathing his sai. A small smile escaped his lips but he turned around to face the city again, not wanting Casey to see it. He sat down.

"What are ya doing up here Case? Won't April be worried?" Truthfully, Raph was glad he had the company of his best friend.

"Nah, I told her I was going out." Casey gave a sad sigh. "I'm sorry man. April told me the situation with Donnie. I had no idea." He shot Raph a look of sympathy, shifting from one side to another uncomfortably. He gave up and sat down beside him. Casey wasn't used to such silence. Normally he and Raph would be drinking and fighting purple dragons, all while having a laugh. Also, he hated to see Raph so down.

He decided to be the first to break the awkward silence. "Nice view of the city up here huh?"

Raph nodded. Casey could see this was going nowhere. Putting a hand on the turtle's shoulder, he smiled a genuine smile. "Come on Raphie. Talk to me, you know you can tell me anything," He chuckled. "Or have you lost trust in me or something?"

Raph snickered and then burst out laughing. He was laughing so hard he almost fell off the roof. Casey was confused at what his friend thought was so funny. He had an annoyed look on his face.

Through tears of laughter he managed to choke out. "I-Is that how ya attempt to comfort people?" He stopped snickering but still kept a mocking smile on his face. "Wow! I feel sorry for April. Imagine her being pregnant and you failing at giving her some support and comfort." He erupted into laughter again.

Casey faked a hurt expression. He was glad that he had managed to cheer Raph up. After Raph calmed down Casey spoke. "Ha Ha! Very funny! Look at yourself! Mr. Tough Guy Raphie probably is worse at comforting people."

Raph thought for a minute and shrugged. "Yeah you're probably right." He smiled.

For a few minutes they stood in silence again, watching the cars drive by.

"So, are ya just gonna leave Donnie like that? You're not going to do anything about it?" He brushed his fingers through his shoulder length black hair.

Raph winced. How could his best friend think like that? Of course he wanted to help Don.

"No Casey. I'll definitely do something about it." He sighed and spoke more softly. "I just don't know what."

"Didn't ya say April was gonna come over? Maybe she can help. She can be very convincing." He chuckled softly to himself and muttered. "I speak from experience."

"Yeah I know." Replied Raph. "But we all tried and it didn't work. Ya can't just expect me to believe that April; someone who isn't even family, can manage to help Don." He sighed, "You don't understand."

Casey crossed his arms. "Yeah your right. I don't understand. I mean, the closest thing I've had to a brother is you four. You, Mikey, Don and Leo. But I know one thing; any brother of mine doesn't give up! Donnie will go back to normal! You will get your brother back!" He gave an encouraging smile.

Raph stared at Casey in awe. _Since when could he give a somewhat inspiring speech? _He thought.

"Thanks Case. We won't give up". He said enthusiastically with a big grin.

However, his smile quickly faded. His voice was quiet, almost like a whisper. "But it's gonna be hard. Don's taken it too far. H-He's been c-cutting. Raph barely managed to choke out the last word.

Casey sighed forlornly. "I know, Leo told me. But don't worry. It'll be **okay.**

He stood up. "Well I gotta go. Before April kills me." He laughed. "It was nice talking to you. And good luck back home."

The red masked turtle nodded sternly, still looking at the city. Casey turned to leave.

"Thanks man."

He stopped.

"Sure".

* * *

When Raph arrived back to the lair, Mikey, Leo and April were all sitting on the couch. They immediately stopped talking when they heard him enter.

As he approached Raph saw that Leo looked annoyed.

"You're late! You were supposed to come back an hour ago. We were all waiting for you." His tone showed clear annoyance.

"Sorry". Raph apologized. "I met Casey and I just lost track of time."

"Whatever. Take a seat". Leonardo gestured to the empty spot on the sofa beside April.

She flashed him a warm smile as he sat down. Leo switched to leader mode; giving orders and planning things. Mikey was sitting next to Leo, looking sad.

"Ok guys! Listen up because I'm not going to repeat myself. Now that everyone is here, I can begin".

They all nodded.

The blue masked leader took a deep breath.

"April will try to talk to Don, and Raph and I will stay right beside her in case of anything. Mikey informed me a while ago that he doesn't want to stay." Leo gave Mikey a sympathetic look. He knew that Mike was the youngest and all this was too hard on him.

Mikey gave an apologetic smile to Raph who shot Mikey a look saying. _You scaredy-cat! Can't you even stay and see what happens to you __**own**__ brother?! _

Leo took the silence as a signal to continue.

"Right! Now, it's about 10 o'clock. We all know that Don doesn't sleep anymore so we have plenty of time. Mike's gonna head to bed at around 12. Then it's only me, April and Raph left. Now, does everyo-"

He was interrupted by an extremely pissed of Raph.

"OK, Ok! We all get it fearless! But what exactly is April gonna say to Don?! All we said never worked. So it's hard for me to believe that April here, is gonna say some magic word, and 'POOF'! Donnie's gonna go back to normal!

Everyone stared at him. He realized what he just said.

"No offense April."

She smiled her usual cheerful smile. "None taken. I understand perfectly what Raph is saying. You guys have tried **everything**, and it's hard for you to believe that what I say is going to make a difference. Trust me; it's hard for me to believe it as well. But you three have run out of options. Just give me a chance. You never know."

Finally, everyone agreed.

* * *

It was exactly 11:58 pm. Mikey headed up to his room. Everyone thought he was going to bed. However, only he knew that he could never fall asleep, for the curiosity of what was going on downstairs was too great. Plus, he would also be too nervous, afraid of what was going to happen next.

They all decided that April was going to confront Don at 3 am. The three of them watched a movie until then, wanting to get their minds of things. April was working out what she was going to say in her head.

Raph barely paid attention to the television. All these questions seemed to pop up into his head. _Would this really work? Will April succeed? Will I finally get my precious brother back?_

* * *

Donnie lay down on the _sick_ bed. The infirmary was the other half of the lab. He had collapsed a while ago, cutting himself on the knifes that were on the floor in the process.

He didn't even bother to treat his wounds. He just lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling while his injuries were bleeding heavily; staining the bed sheets in red. He had a terrible headache.

_I'm losing a dangerous amount of blood._ He thought. _At this rate, it could be fatal. Ugh. I don't even care anymore. Maybe it's better that way…._

He turned on his side, almost screaming out in pain. He managed to pull out the knife that was stuck in his leg. The wound was bleeding more now.

With every drop of blood that poured out, the dizzier he became. Donnie could feel himself losing consciousness.

_Why me? Why does it hurt so much? Physically and emotionally… Why did I have to get sent to the future?_

He let a few tears slip out, blurring his vision more.

_Why do I suddenly want Mikey, Raph and Leo to be here with me? Why do I want them to hug me and just let me cry in their arms? Leo's the oldest; shouldn't he always be there for support? I'm his younger brother…doesn't he love me? Why? Can't they make the pain stop? It's not fair…_

And with that final thought, he let himself slip into unconsciousness.

**I hope you enjoyed chapter 4! I'm not sure whether to continue or not. You guys tell me. Should I continue? Leave a review and tell me. Also, what do you guys think? In my next chapter, Should I write what Don's thinking as April talks to him? **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey Everyone! I'm back and I'm really sorry for the long wait. What can I say? I'm a lazy person haha. So this is either my second last chapter or my third last chapter. I haven't decided yet. Enjoy!**

The time finally came. As soon as the clock struck three, they all shot each other nervous glances. Sighing, Leo stood up shakily. "Ready April?"

Raph's eyes were fixed on the television screen. He wanted to get up, but his body was telling him to stay put. Why? He didn't know. All Raph knew was that this whole thing wouldn't work. So why did he come up with that stupid idea anyway? Maybe he just ran out of options, driven so badly into despair that he would try anything. All he wanted was his brother back. Was that too much to ask?

"Go home." His eyes didn't leave the screen. Something just snapped. Surprised at his own words, Raph lowered his gaze to the floor, hoping he knew what he was doing.

April blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Go home." Raph repeated, louder this time.

Leo stepped in front of April. "What's your damn problem?! This was your idea in the first place!"

The red masked brother expected this was going to happen. His body finally allowed him to move so he stood up.

"Look April. I'm sorry we dragged you into this; it's not your problem. Just please go home. I can deal with this. Trust me."

His thick Brooklyn accent was so loud it could be heard from the second floor.

Leo and April looked hesitant but that one word tipped them over. _Trust me._

April shrugged then smiled. "If you think you can handle it, go ahead." Her voice became quieter, softer. "But please, help Donnie".

Raph nodded.

* * *

It was now 5:30 am. Miraculously, Raph somehow convinced Leo to go to bed. Luckily it didn't end it bloodshed.

Now he was alone, ready to face Don. In all honesty, he wasn't ready. Not one bit. All he wanted to do was to push a big, red button and have old Donnie back. However, nothing was that easy.

His throat was dry, so he tried swallowing but that made it more uncomfortable. _How do I do this? I need to think like Leo. He's good at planning shit. So Don's self harming._ He winced at that thought. _That means he must be really weak from the blood loss which means I need to get him to eat. Ugh screw it! Stop thinking and just do it!_

**Donnie's POV**

The light blinded me for a few seconds. The light of my desk lamp, which I'm using to examine and treat my wounds. I've decided I don't want to die yet, so I can't risk having my injuries infected.

My world is a blur. Before, I wanted to die. Now I don't. This thumping in my head won't stop. I have a terrible headache from dehydration. It hurts. The image of my dead brothers is still there. I haven't seen Leo, Raph and Mikey ever since I came back. I don't even know if I want to see them. It would be too painful. And that's the last thing I need; more pain. I haven't left my lab at all. My bedroom; probably like I left it. My brothers; probably worried. I hate to cause them so much pain. Nightmares don't happen anymore, due to the fact that I gave up on sleeping. Food is the least of my concern. I've gotten used to the empty feeling in my stomach. The door; locked. I desperately want someone to help me. I don't want to live like this anymore. Staring at the picture of the four of us that was one the table, I couldn't help but examine each of them. Mikey is smiling, his eyes shining with happiness. Happiness that I took away. Raph has a smirk on his face. Leo carries a playful grin and I look….happy. Like I used to be. I admit, I have a problem, a really big one; one that won't go away. But why won't anyone help me? I glance at the knife again.

**Narrator's POV**

Meanwhile, Raph was standing in front of Donnie's door. The only thing he felt now was anger. _Don __**is**__ going back to normal and he's doing it __**tonight**__! _He thought.

However, he was scared. Yes, Raph was scared. Terrified even. He was lacking confidence in himself. Mikey was closest to Don and not even he could help him. How could Raph?

Nonetheless, he took a deep breath and kicked the door, ignoring the throbbing pain in his right leg.

"I SWEAR DONNIE, IF YOU DON'T OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR I WILL TEAR IT APART PERSONALLY!"

He panted, shocked at his sudden outburst of rage. The only sound he heard in reply was a faint gasp, probably from Donnie who was surprised at the sudden, loud noise. Raph noted that the gasp was quite audible and it seemed close, which meant Don must be right beside the door, on the other side.

Raph scowled. He spotted four large screws on every corner of the metal door. Seeing this as an opportunity, he pulled out his sai and smirked.

In one swift movement, he pulled out the screw on the top left corner using the longest, sharpest point of his sai. It fell out of the hole and dropped onto the floor with the tiniest click.

He repeated the process three more times until all four screws were at his feet.

Sheathing his weapon, he delivered a powerful kick to the door. It collapsed inwards, making a loud clash. Raph prayed his two brothers wouldn't wake up. Now, he had a clear view of the entire lab.

Donnie was on the ground, beside the broken door. Half of the door crashed down onto his foot, immobilizing him. His eyes were filled with fear. The lab was exactly like the last time Raph saw it. He shuddered as he remembered the blood and knifes.

He turned his focus to Don, who was staring up at his big brother in awe, wondering how, after all these weeks could he have managed to break down the door after he made sure to make it as strong as possible.

The older of the two could feel tears in the back of his eyes. **This was Donnie.** He had finally seen him after so long. But he wasn't willing to let them fall.

**Raph's POV**

I saw Don staring at me with his innocent eyes and at that moment, I instantly melted on the inside. The brother I had longed to see so badly is right in front of me. I could finally help him. I could finally comfort him. The door, no, the evil wall that kept me from seeing Don was gone.

I examined him and noticed that his eyes were clouded. He had cuts all over his body but the deepest cut was on his leg. He looked so pale, sad, and helpless. My poor baby brother. What did he have to go through in that horrible place?

**Narrator's POV**

As Raph stepped closer, Don backed away a bit. He didn't dare say anything to his elder brother.

The red masked turtle didn't know whether to feel happy, angry or both. He kneeled down beside Donnie, who looked like he was going to faint any second now.

Raphael cursed the tears that were blurring his vision. Without warning, he grabbed his younger brother into a tight hug, not wanting to let go and lose him again.

"I missed you bro….."

**Tell me if you liked it and please review if you want more I hope you enjoyed.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi! I know I haven't updated 'It's Not Fair' for AGES, and I'm really sorry for those of you who have been waiting. Since I have lots of free time now, I will be able to write more. This is the last chapter to this story. Enjoy!**

**Don's POV**

As I felt Raph's grip tighten, my eyes started watering too. I just couldn't hold it in anymore.

"Please Raph….help me, I don't want to suffer anymore." I pleaded; my voice so quiet you could barely hear it.

"Shhhh Donnie…you're gonna be okay. I'm here now". That was all I got in reply.

I felt my head pounding; my breath came out in short gasps. Why was I feeling this way? The room started spinning around me, and Raph's tight grip was making me breathe harder. He didn't seem to realize. The throbbing in my head was too much. I decided to let myself go. Feeling myself losing control of my body, I fell into my brother's chest. The last thing I saw was him giving a sad smile. For what? Why was he smiling? For the first time in weeks, I fell asleep. Why did I give in so easily? My other brothers couldn't help me, but Raph could? I guess I owe him.

I woke up in a room. It was familiar, though I haven't seen it in ages. A hammock. Was I in a hammock? If I can remember clearly, Raph was the only one who slept in a hammock. So I was in his room. He must have carried me here. How long have I slept?

Glancing at the shelf above me, I saw the small alarm clock he always kept for waking up every day for training. My vision was still slightly blurry, I had to pick it up and bring it closer to my face to read it. 6:00pm. Realizing I slept for almost two days, I sighed; not wanting to go down to face everyone. When was Raph coming back? Surely he didn't intend to leave me here.

Getting some sleep made me feel better. Heck! Who am I kidding? It made me feel **way** better. I didn't feel tired anymore. My headache was still there, although it wasn't as bad as before. Only a slight pounding.

"You're awake?"

I gasped, but immediately relaxed once I saw my older brother standing in the doorway. Truthfully, I was afraid of him. I couldn't read his expression. Was it anger? Usually that would be my first guess, but now, I didn't know.

"Are you feeling ok?" The moment he said this, I realized. My brother wasn't angry. He was worried. I should have known; living with him for all my life. However, isolating myself for so long, I forgot he masks his worry with a look of anger.

I nodded; afraid to speak. He handed me a bottle of water, which I drank gratefully. The refreshing liquid instantly calmed my headache down.

As he came closer, I moved backwards, still in the hammock.

"I want you to listen to me Donnie." His face immediately softened and he gave me a look of sympathy.

"I don't know what that dimension was like. I really don't. And I couldn't even imagine losing you three. But if I knew it caused you so much pain, I would have gladly taken your place." He shifted his gaze down to the floor.

"But." Raph continued.

"It wasn't real. I want you to understand that. It was **not** real!" He pronounced those three sentences clearly, without his Brooklyn accent.

"How would you know!? You weren't there! You act as if you know everything Raphael! But you don't!" I screamed, clenching my fist.

Raph growled, drawing out his weapon, but sheathed it shortly after. Noting that Raph wasn't going to say anything, I continued.

"I don't want advice from you! The hot-head who blames others for everything and hurts himself, using pain as a way to escape reality!"

I stopped dead in my tracks, instantly regretting what I had just said. _Hurts himself, using pain as a way to escape reality._

"Raph I'm sorry, I didn't mean t-" I started but was interrupted by Raph.

"You're the one to talk!" He spat out in disgust. "I want some explanations! If you think I didn't see the blood and knifes in your lab, then you're kidding yourself. You were cutting? Are you fucking insane?!"

I bit my lip. So he had seen…

"Raph no…I….."

"Save it! Don't you understand we want you to get better?" Raph said sadly.

"I am better." I muttered.

"Sure ya are! When I leave the room you're probably going to go back to your lab and start this whole fiasco again!" He cringed, and then spoke softly, barely above a whisper. "I don't want this to happen again."

I got out of the hammock and kneeled down beside him. Suddenly, I was knocked onto my back by Raph. As he hugged me tighter, I felt sorry for him. It was my fault he was suffering this much. All of them; including Mikey and Leo.

I heard him sniffle, and his shoulders started shaking. I guessed he was crying, and I couldn't blame him.

"Promise you won't do it again. Promise you're gonna go back to normal…please."

I heard the pain in his voice, and hugging back, I whispered.

"I won't Raph. I'm sorry for making the three of you go through all of this." I really meant it.

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"You feeling ok Donnie? You up to it?" Raph smiled lovingly.

I tried my best to smile, but I was still a bit weak. Nonetheless, I had to go see my brothers.

"Yep!"

"Good. Now let's go. They must be in the kitchen." Raph walked in front of me.

As we got there, I felt a little nervous. I haven't seen them in weeks.

I hid behind Raph shyly, and felt a bit stupid for doing so. It was like I was a little kid again.

He stood in the doorway of the kitchen, with me behind him.

"Guys! I wanna show you something." Raph said cheerfully. Mikey and Leo looked up from their breakfast.

"Is this really the time Raph?" Leo asked tiredly.

"Oh it'll be worth it. Come on Donnie." Raph looked behind him as I slowly entered the kitchen. "Uh hi guys." I waved nervously.

In a flash, the two of them were beside me.

Mikey and Leo both hugged me. "Donnie!" They both shouted happily, while Raph laughed. They looked so happy to see me.

Things got better from then on. I started eating again. I don't think I'll ever forget what I saw in that dimension, but I acknowledge that it wasn't real now.

I'm happy again, and I've adjusted to my normal life. They weren't too angry at me, probably because they were too happy to be angry.

April and Casey were equally overjoyed. Especially April.

The only bad part was that I had to suffer through a three hour lecture from Leo about self harming and had to swear to never do it again. In a strange way, this whole thing had brought me closer to my brothers, Raph most of all. He was the one that actually helped me.

I guess I owe him big time.

**The End everyone! I finally finished this story, I'm so happy. Now I can concentrate on 'A New Life'. Please tell me what you guys thought of it. Constructive Criticism, opinion etc. And please only Flames if it's for a good reason. Thank you for reading it and I hope you liked it 3**

**-Izzy xx**


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